You know that scene in Fever Pitch, where Jimmy Fallon’s character goes on about how he can always count on the Red Sox to let him down every year?  That’s how I feel right now.  

I had a great day today.  I watched four soccer games while getting in a few hours of Warcraft (or as my fiancé calls it: Nerdcraft).  It was all a Saturday should be.   Then my favorite team decided to remind me that pre-season optimism is reserved solely for the other teams in MLS. 

4-0?

Is that really necessary?  I mean I would’ve gotten the point just fine with a 2-0 loss, at least then I would still have my self-respect.  But no, we had to do it up Galaxy Style.  Just like In-N-Out has Animal Style, we have Galaxy Style.  Where your team comes with apathy, a side of lethargy, and a heaping pile of suckiness.  Where was the passion?  Where was the heart?  For that matter, where was the midfield?  

Do you hear that sound?  It’s the sound of a million little keyboards, in twenty different languages all typing how the Galaxy is a pub team.  Are they right?  Let’s analyze what went wrong.

 The first half was not an attractive game, but it was definitely winnable. Short of a poor clearance and lucky rebound off a post, the Galaxy were in it.  One has to put some blame on Steve Cronin for not locking down his near post.  That is keeper positioning 101, never get beat near post.  Give it up to Terry Cooke though, that was a hell of a strike.  The Galaxy had opportunities as well, but it looked every bit that this was the first time Ruiz, Donovan and Beckham were on the pitch together.  No one was on the same page yet.

 The second half?  Well that was just comical.  As much as I, as a fan, want to blame all the rookies on the field, for every poor touch and every bad pass, you can’t.  There was no leader out there today, no one picking these kids up and calming them down.  You could see the fear in them.  They were not ready for this kind of pressure.  For that I fault Donovan and Beckham.  One of them needed to step up and put their mark on the game.  All those guys look to them as an example.  Ruiz, despite his lack of production, was at least Charlie Hustle out there, running down 50 yard long balls as a lone striker. 

The penalty call on Abel Xavier was absolutely horrible.  Yet I know, as every other person that has played central defense knows, that if you go to ground in the box you are putting the game in the ref’s hands.  So as hard done as he may have felt, he knows he took a risk.  Once this penalty happened, the game shifted. 

Pressing hard for goals, LA left gaping holes in midfield and defense.  This allowed Colorado to play into their strength and LA’s weakness, speed.  The last two goals were a product of just that.  You saw slow defenders playing on their heels and getting turned.  What’s the solution to this problem?  In my opinion, you have to find a place for the recovery speed of Michael Randolph in that back line.  He is the only hope for Xavier and Vanney’s partnership. 

So my team is losing 4-0 and I actually accidently hit myself in the groin while throwing down my Galaxy scarf.  What could make my night worse?  How about seeing about 20% of our salary cap being stretchered off the field in the dying minutes.  Awesome.  It’s a great time to be a soccer fan in LA.  I can’t wait to see all this in person, Thursday night, from my most expensive season ticket seat in the league.